Packing Made Possible

April 23rd~

Packing to move myself across a sea for medical school... Ha! That's the impossible realization of the day! For the past 48 hours, thoughts would pop into my head of what to do, to pack, to look up, to say to people. Sleep was even more impossible than packing, so it seemed. I realized that 3:03 AM was the perfect time for your brain to awaken abruptly and pour out all the reminders of things you had forgotten to do in the days before. Another feat was simply trying to think of all the things I'll be doing in the next 8 months. It seemed nearly impossible to fathom, little on pack for it. (To say that I'm exhausted from a lack of sleep would be a total inaccurate depiction of what really went on that caused me such exhaustion while I was at my parents' house trying to squeeze and maneuver things into suit cases and bags. It is the workout you get from packing that has left me completely limp & sore! My quads hurt from jumping on airtight bags of clothes in attempts to squish out all the air that was possibly making my clothes look so abundant! My arms hurt from pulling together zippers that never were meant to stretch that far. My inner thighs got the best workout, by far. This is because I realized that sitting on top of suitcases wasn't squishing the lids closed enough to pull the exacerbated zippers together. So, I got creative. My thighs got a phenomenal workout when I propped the suitcases to a standing position and used my inner thighs to squeeze the gaping mouths of the suitcases closed! Bam! I can't tell you how amazing it is for ones self esteem to realize that what your weight could not accomplish, your thighs could! )

When I took one look at the allotted number of suitcases i was allowed and compared that with all that I had displayed and inventoried to pack, I just about came undone. In that moment I realized it would take God Himself to get all that stuff to my new home... and maybe a few great friends to pep talk me or assist me in defeating this crazy notion of packing. It was then that I remembered verse 2 Corinthians 10:5 about captivating your thoughts. At this point I decided that impossible wasn't in my vocabulary. After lots of thought, finagling, and thigh presses, only about 75-80% of my planned pack list actually came with me. The impossible became possible!

Wait. Listen. Act.

Words of my ever-learning heart:
Seek and hope in The Lord as you wait (Lamentations 3:24-26) on Him. Holding hope and anticipation in your heart will prevent you from settling with fear and worries. By seeking Him in this waiting time, you develop a faith in His good works that uproots any fear or worries from dwelling in your heart. Do this because there will be a day that comes when He tells you that the time is now upon you. He has been clearing a path for you to take and this path is good and perfect. Do this so that when the time comes that He calls you forth to begin running on a path He paved for you, you don't cower at the task. When He calls you to a path, leap in faith no matter how scared or pained it may leave you. Sometimes if a heart is humble, its limited understanding will cause us to take one look at the path ahead of us and immediately panic. It may shout, "God, I cannot do this. You must have meant someone else!"
Do not hesitate, because The Lord will reap His glory in all things with or without you. So ask yourself, do you want to be with Him or without Him when He gets all the glory? Do you think there was any easy part of Jesus following God? Do you think there was anything less than fear and pain?